This rage tirade brought to you by ‘Comments’…


Yes, comments.  Anonymous comments that people are allowed to leave everywhere they like.  That is, after all, the beauty of the internet.  But sometimes, that beauty makes me angry.  OK, let me back up a step here.

I read tons of things over the course of a day.  I mean tons.  And as every other person on the face of the planet, I tend to gravitate toward things that are of interest to or relevant to me.  Thus, being a lesbian, I read a lot about the day to day battle for LGBT equality.  And whether it be a positive or a negative article, there is the inevitable comments section at the bottom of all of them.  I tell myself to stay away.  OTHER people tell me to stay away.  HH doesn’t even understand how I can stomach the amount of politics that I do on a daily basis.  And yet…and yet, my stupid index finger just keeps on scrolling down to read those comments.

I’ll admit, over the years, the split has gotten much better.  For every positive comment, there used to be 15 negative ones calling the positive commenter a left-wing, liberal, fucktard, Obama-lover who hates Jesus and America and should just go and shit on George Washington’s grave, cause that’s what they are already doing by supporting gay marriage.  Now, the ratio is closer to 1 to 5, but still.

There are those who start spewing their misinterpreted bible passages (all two of them), and those who find it disgusting just ‘cause, those who don’t understand it.  I love the idiots who still believe that being gay is a choice.   They don’t believe that gays are being discriminated against at all, because we should just go out and get a hetero marriage, like we’re s’possed to.  The one that always makes me laugh is that marriage is solely for the purpose of procreation and anyone who can’t procreate shouldn’t be married.  Which basically rules out anyone over the age of 45 and anyone with fertility issues.  The funny part of that one is that how the hell are you supposed to know if you’re fertile or not, since you’re not supposed to have sex before marriage anyway?!?!

There is, however, one vein of the comments that enrages me to absolutely no end.  And it’s funny, because it generally comes from a person who is somewhat supportive of granting rights to LGBT people, but believes that it shouldn’t be called “Marriage”.  They believe that marriage is a religious institution, which is all fine and good, except that its the GOVERNMENT THAT ISSUES MARRIAGE LICENSES!!!  The religious institution simply provides a marriage certificate (not the same as a license) which states that a ceremony has taken place, and voila, you’re married in the eyes of the lord.

So this is what pisses me off:  If marriage is solely a religious ceremony, then why, oh straight people, do you continue to go to your local county clerks’ office to obtain your non-denominational government sanctioned marriage license?  Oh right, that’s because God doesn’t provide you with the ability to get a nice tax-break for sharing your life with someone else.  And God doesn’t let you into the hospital when your loved one is sick.  And God doesn’t provide you with inheritance rights or insurance benefits or automatic joint parenting rights or social security or any of the other thousand rights that are provided BY THE GOVERNMENT to married persons.

Now, I want to say, that I actually agree with this.  I do believe that marriage is a religious institution and I have no problem with it remaining so.  However, when people get married, in the church/synagogue/mosque/holy-place of their choosing, it should have absolutely no bearing whatsoever on any and all legal rights granted by the government.  This country was founded on a principle of religious freedom and a separation of church and state, and as such, should have separate distinctions for marriage from a religious standpoint and from a civil standpoint.  And you should be able to have either one of them or both, if you so choose.  If being married in the eyes of God is all that’s important to you, Great!  Enjoy your holy marriage.  An atheist who’s just in love and want to spend your life with someone?  Perfect.  Have a nice life with your civil marriage.  Want both?  Go for it!  Separately.

(Sorry Mom and Dad, I’m about to throw you under the bus.)  My parents were married in a civil ceremony by the justice of the peace.  They were never married by the church, so technically, have been living in sin in the eyes of God for the last 30 years.  They are also the best couple I have ever seen and I swear, I’m not saying that just because they are my parents.  (Who says that about their parents, anyway?)  So really, they have a civil marriage only.  I don’t believe they have suffered in any way for this aside from being told that they could not renew their vows in a Catholic church for their 20th anniversary, because, according to that church, they had never taken vows to begin with.  The priests wanted them to take pre-cana and be subject to their determination as to whether they were a compatible fit for each other.  Yeah, sure.  Marriage advice on their 20th anniversary from a bunch of old, single guys.  But the point is that they have done just fine with what is essentially a civil union.  They didn’t need God’s blessing in order to make themselves a great life.

So call it civil union or civil marriage or the funky monkey or whatever.  I don’t really care what it’s called, I just want the same rights as everyone else who wants to get married in the eyes of the government.  And everyone who wants to get married in the eyes of God, have at it.  Just remember, God doesn’t let you file joint taxes.

One thought on “This rage tirade brought to you by ‘Comments’…

  1. I am weeping ! How I wish you could be married everyday , but for now we are on hold. I do believe one in this lifetime we will see the accepentence. You did not through us under the bus either, you never could. But I know where you are coming from. Lets continue to pray for acceptence soon, let God judge us all when we get there, where ever there is. God Bless us EVERYONE.
    Love Mom
    PS Well written too.

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